The Church of Lazlo - 05.18.17 - Headlines

Thursday, May 18th


Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

The righteous. Homeland. Well if you are. I would just sitting on started hot shot your I think I'm ready. Expenses to. Alonso in the news. Just down. Are you. I mean. Wrong. Sounds like he was. Man I'm still learning your idol and in stressing you know I really enjoy your China's current I don't know I didn't. On furniture last night still don't want women so we did go a few games are generalize and when you know the name and new rules on them so we did it did he was like Parcells. After all that talk. Cancer. The bottom Bennett jazz eyes he got the furniture moved in from some of Coca. I'm getting there but you don't have a look at man divorces are easy yeah being single is hard. He shows then yeah. It's figuring out what to do after a run. Let you know time I didn't I'm good I just don't have anything. And I think you meant my houses site you've seen the master bedroom is just into how it's time for your honest indeed. It's time you're around spinning eight months nine months there's nothing I master bedroom go to and I'm my minimalist plot and a wedding quilts. And an ironing board that's it puzzles and Ayman minimalist so I don't like a lot of furniture yeah so that's good. Like man there's so come to your tired your health 'cause my problems girl probably causes and I was as soon remember only to Glenn. But I was like yeah girls yeah. Hillary what we listen to everything yeah I was playing so I'm glad I will analyze and got to be kidding. Everything else is all right life. Sure like today I don't you just walked in here earlier and he had a little flip manner shirt on which no tone and look to me sort of laughed and said. C'mon man Clinton doesn't match. And I got you jump to your series say a man hopes that I was like hold on a second unlike. I am a guy but I'm no social justice warrior. And certainly. It takes a lot for me to be moved day in and some people would even call me a sociopath. But children drinking forty's anybody else do the dirty water. Kansas City with a bad wow I think children and placing your point I was becoming I think the word is I don't know what it is anymore. Yeah. Man something divergent there's something to learn. Drink the water becoming something divergent social those roars you know I've got word I'm looking for I don't know it. I know this series I don't know. And it comes from drinking led. Man these kids are yeah. They're losing IQ points as we speak now I'm not cool right. We never ready to begin with so we're doing. Oh yeah meet you that you think it's some sort of turn I don't know you're not allowed to say is making an Emmy. Some there. Some thing all right there's some I'll dancers and Haiti and mentally and say another word Ryan I don't know I'm her like two or three times in the last week mean now you can't Wright say any thing is always going to be offense doesn't go I like her. Friends are all social workers and I think I might have made the mistake of saying our. They sound like Arizona and Arizona and emergent never but man might be diverse I don't couples. Non okay mental divergences. OK now let's just move along quickly to your gallery do we know we're talking about. We were through Georgia and the listeners and emergent and divert. Obviously I was kidding about no you were you saying come and they don't matter as I said man of those kids are growing up with serious mental problems and those are from flood. Yeah OK I don't. He says that I'd never sound. This is horrifying not true. To be honest and us doesn't kind of thing you would say if I wore that teachers into the non. Username and I would say that it views and I know I feel like audacity nominee taillight out Canada to slow your roll nobody believes you don't. All right I'm wearing a flood matters future looks good and that's the city and it matters because there. Get dirty water and it's killing people got kids decades. Making them diversion serious. Yes we don't know exactly what I'm. Okay Brian Brian. I'd make tax I'll try to find sort of again you reduce or not users and headlines. I'm sure the big headlines in mean we were able to not start with. Trump news but its net you know people that. Cost of someone's life I guess sad news woke up this morning two people died one of them I was I think people were pretty upset about are a lot of us troops are about Oscars. We're not record how has just finished a sold out performance here in Detroit at fox theater and he then went back to his hotel room at the MGM Detroit. So little after midnight Cornell Weis called the band member. Asked him to do what checked on him. When he finds nowhere to strip the new aero doesn't know why he gets security security at the MGM get into the hotel room and that's what they find Cornell. Dead in his bathroom without band around his neck. It does appear that Cornell took his own life on autopsy will be scheduled probably today we're not sure of the time they try please tell me that they are still investigating this incident. That guys some radio guy from Detroit's. To get a big break days on national news segment and I just got an update a couple hours ago this and they have now said officially that it's suicide. Man you know yeah I got anything going to update from USA today is that what Hussein is no way he wasn't the right. Let me see what this says here's says. This episode got it. Medical examiner dot December and singer Chris Cornell is ruled a suicide. 2001 o'clock. So he spent an afternoon in Kansas City and fly straight to Detroit and easy to swallow this pension. Blah da Matta troubled times and I'm not right. And then there was another death today as well. Roger Ailes and yet the man behind Fox News he doesn't yeah he doesn't. Buchanan Joseph Paterno style like it's weird like I just you know god everything's coming crashing down I'm old and I can't take it yeah for people who don't know he was ousted you know within the last year for Fox News for these sexual allegations. Different women who work to Fox News claiming that he you know held back their careers because they refused to. And offer sexual favors. And then he finally stepped down and maniac and a Paterno style and die he was 77 but this is Fox News breaking the announcement about his depths of. Now miss Fox News alert Roger Ailes has passed away and you only know of him what you read in recent months when you didn't know him. But here's a man who almost single handedly built Fox News Channel from absolutely nothing. Into the most watched cable news operation and often deemed most watched channel and all cable. Not possible to pay tribute to his accomplishments in just a few words. The son of a blue collar worker Roger never forgot his Ohio roots even when he was there advising president. He was able to spot abilities in people and summoned from them their very best work. Thousands of us here at Fox News and Fox Business Network and other TV networks as well oh our careers to him if he had his fault we all do. Yes he had his faults then I'll do. Not all are here as bad as it's you know we've done a lot of that's for recent college ball's just not. I like and red black and white to resolve has made mistakes I mean wasn't there is between you and Manson. We all I'm Hyannis Vijay did he kill people. Whatever the case maybe we're not no longer in the I drink a little too much Ted Bundy did what he did and Rolf none of them that the the rock flawed. He did well no it is dead no need to drag and I'll. And then Murdoch's the yeah Murdoch's alive. And of course trump thumb. You know they've they announced this this former. Headed the FBI to lead this independent investigation. And trumps not happy trounced in terms the system so angry trust and trust that boasts atrocities that comes in this will go on this week's time. President trump is calling the Justice Department's federal investigation and his campaign's potential. Russia which shocked some reacted to the DOJ is naming of ex FBI director Robert Mueller as a special counsel to believe investigation on Twitter Thursday. Said with all of the illegal acts that took place in the Clinton Campaign and Obama administration there was never special counsel appointed a Teddy go off former digital strategist for Hillary Clinton during her campaign pointed to the spelling here in the tweet writing he really has trouble with the word council plus some didn't go into detail about yeah. Illegal acts he referenced he did go on to write this is the single greatest switch son of a politician in American history. You know yesterday gave that speech said no president has been treated worse they remain of course the Internet to struggling JFK was actually shot in the back. Notice Lincoln had a pretty rounds there's been some gals produced or I think Eugene about the tweets this morning as he says. With everything Hillary and Barack did illegal there were no special investigations and bush didn't play aside Hillary bill what did. Always very accused of doing that was illegal to blame from Kenya right that was it right Venus I don't and they must nowadays are and over and over again. That was the big it is. Hey I'm just like him and his presidency was pretty much stand a single friend in trouble whatsoever. But what. That's mean how many lives and not a right but it just seems like a weird thing did. George exam on the remain in the bottom line is with this these these spell check now president. They've been looked into they looked into numerous times. How does he keep misspelling things on his Twitter first of all you'd think there'd be someone that says Mr. President we as well. Yeah counsel and counsel all right so but but he's had these problems in the past he deleted tweets three different times to see I'm no ground on loan more bullets I'll core gamers yeah that's right I'm John drawn strength comes out of my brand. You would think. People leave it there and fastest time Palin alone it is to lose traction you'd think that they would have people who say all right you know we're I can say we can't you say let's just make sure like role. Got a spelling error here you go. There ego trumps being investigated by a desire and trump said some things return calls and some victim of which time. Today he's getting ready to take his first big just blow you why you addressed almighty god fresher look at him. This shirt was actually lane. On top Mike Pyle laundries and his third on Mike got up this morning it was kind of cool out. So popular on Ozal Chile some vast Cilic. I don't believe there's something going on no control that's the reason this shirt has wrinkles around the iron and I admire anything I was chili sauce regularly consumer know. There is an interval you also correlate to instantly content now. Measures face lieutenant no I haven't and I don't I put on zinc dream because right now hasn't tanning lotion and it would not there's no main motion sensor. It's that one yet you do get by the way but I don't I'm not wearing it right now.