The Church of Lazlo - 04.20.17 - Headlines

Thursday, April 20th


Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

The righteous man. On all sides. The value dark. Will strike down low numbers on the. Hi I am a great area I'm done man. Shoots. Chicks chicks man girls. Done damn. Watch how Snowe Collins visited news sports when he insurance well you're at a Ford plans and you might do without it for a few years. As Eric call your response to it when we did it last year is what the hell is that. Citizens for Tony intro. He said it's stupid. I don't understand unfortunately chosen. I don't really either but people love it I know I do but I feel like c'mon man. YEE. Are you getting more behind now today unfortunately you did before nineteen they claim they are. I'm taking the day off phenomena smokes so much we disease. This Phillies lose that lunch we rented a lot of days off rice yeah you probably smoke a lot every day and you take a lot of days off. Constantly to work. And it didn't I don't know that it is celebration. Causing up from the sales girls so. Harrison. I. You got problems I got major issues I majors she may need you need to smuggle illegally and down let go. There ray. You all sigh. Selfish. Here any. Evil man. Name okay being good well he moved a half Kurds don't week. Darned good burn. Maria. Hi in your lives you know you. Series paying the. I. Those who remember the my knee in the lower who. And I laid my. Against her she. There you go snow I don't know I don't know who rarely if someone's going to start evidence that. No sign that read you know nobody's ever done excellent work I heard yeah. He did such a good job a near Sarasota urinary on the mr. Cullen avenue and ideas sooner than. I feel like Cleary has had I don't know in the next four we will let you were. Brought David I want you know like we know and then as the intro from now on. Found no. Mark what do we still don't. Know why don't like and everything. Of course people around the stereotype. Of donors that the other is that only until my. Those people off who. Who. Did defensively also. And listen willingness. And he says name. Jared bears. And conflict now. Yeah I know you don't it's a joke. Some of you do. Not say most if you if you don't view it it's eventually. And you know on seems endless references arsenals and a lot in junior high and high school and bill. That it happened at some point in the end it sounds like you do a little lesson on senators and no way. Loosely organized. Everybody you guys who want to conceal his blues band with DNA data has aroused that is the worst thing to notice when a buys a movie right pull money you guys these pictures they took these tigers to sanctuary in your reads screens and and and I got a man got a new camera I got a new lens barrel are. I'm gonna go worst enemy it's all volunteer men who work with what Arizona is my friend down on Antonio did dealers lunch no don't do that numerous times. I send them. Yeah. I saw someone on closing yesterday were fortunate Christian saying that it's been awhile since she and guess who's kind of go fourteen point would be good days do but I. I don't think it must have we choke on as if I doesn't he bring it. The greens are moving to zero Garza's in his garden I don't really got to change I forgot I had Shaq one on my home. Well you even know you know you do branded and I'm not sure what you are not sure I'm not sure how are you can't remember what you did you just Don your ten minutes I went to put it. You just under ten minutes he doesn't you don't put an undercard twenty minutes ago for you didn't. I don't think it's from Baghdad that's that's actually ingredient that I want to. Actually your own I hope that that's not why we have you around. You know you just good that you just made yourself available so I thought the president herself available and and look at her I don't know if given a broken tail lives. Who does not have fans jobs at at a snow drones looking. Good job on a man who. I'm menu was ready in that when it's. Calm man. You just said yeah yeah or something man I'm gonna look for a I got a guy sent home all the good yeah right and too late now yeah. All right that's that's good on the unfortunately some friends sir we did it. There was happy. Celebrate your. Whatever. Medicine in the news tonight. Okay yeah I. Or doing. Don't smoke yourself hold on number. Don't smoke yourself old tin foil hat. Just tonight. Let's just like anything else. Don't drink yourself just straight just the best variety of items okay hasn't drench your garden. Just next week it does copy those guys and I madame free no charge money. Because a job and end. She treats those cops in Minnesota sent. Now today. Police are small town my computer and yes there's an opener showed me again and the tuna. It's soon so yes so it's it's still legal. And a police they're sent out this thing is said and done. We get the actual teeth undercover hash tag for Tony operations are in place to street tracks and set up throughout the city today. A picture of a back injury goes she'd claiming that she does mountain do. Battlefield for Xbox long Grand Theft Auto for Xbox-360. Some white castle burgers and something else a look controller. It's all sitting on the ground it apart and in the background there's a police officer than men. He's waiting for a I mean that's real funny unless you're did you know. Anyway getting jobs right because you got busted for pot. Seven years ago. And last note on his riches now isn't Exxon thing in a 47000 dollar laptop. Maybe you're happen Johnson Bryant he's got credit that I nationals don't rent to own and rent and own credit pitches to them. Secret a couple of practice I assure you learn to pick up our rental that is that is tees here that's just for you see you know court. Let's welcome my gym by 700 dollar camera boom boom you know as you can send pictures wirelessly doesn't your phone do that's then I got them I was limited is always depended on about they can't imagine a beautiful an enemy to you November I was like man. Attitude isn't that much better then my I've found that my iPhone soon and you like within. I can take it and then sitting here as well and it's in my computer and then I assume I can do than I uploaded it. To all these social media sites alike don't compromising my phone doesn't autumn and I'm sure. I just don't automatically is trying to help. I'm sure he Chia. When my son uses a camera broke okay I'll ride the shoulder. There gonna drop that into drugs should just cancel. Me and. Astra nose broken nose. But text from. Should they remember the day you'll live in infamy today to 700 dollar unpaid for camera how much. Al to the floor. It's. Come on many got to be laughing yourself. We've all done it about 400 dollars with the underwear and old navy with the credit card I forgot all about and wasn't able to buy a house for ten years because of boxers probably trapped in. It happens. I never went full rent on. That's another level you went full Raton. You should never go full Fritz I'm manner you can you know put too much on a credit Carter. You don't get crazy with the good news today come on interest free never go full rounds and never go full ringtone. I totally get the allure of five year interest repayments. But that's different. But he learned a valuable lesson right now I'm gonna do it again. No. Myself every guy in their twenties this. None none none maybe. You we all make mistakes. Don't we don't mind cameras. And for years. I mean yeah I mean really bad mistakes. It really dumb things drunk. Treated people Orly. Got a lot of stuff to go through my date tonight instead if I ever did there are a lot of army isn't return their rent to own camera. Again my worst days I wasn't like you know I need to do is rent discounts for about nine years. The yacht works out this is great if I'm doing the math. I gotta pay discounts offered the next nine years. What is Suzanne payments only Harden 82 bucks a month alone but we have another week all the damage reared its four times a month. All right. We got it but I got as Apple MacBook sleep Palin. I got around to for a year or so clearly the way they builds and it'll be you know up today to eight years from now. Well I bunnies software and in form because the man at eight years from now we'll still remain items that one. Know guys is only 7991. X for as little as twenty dollars today. I know I go to when he goes today. Once Tony books and revenues cured for four bucks a week to. So let's go out. Position Myles Brand saw some. OK okay. I hate you got a lot of nice blue and soon the edges of the moon pursuant where. This is the first. Is just making a lot of links are right thing imagine all the that we don't know how communities are very pleased and that is don't you guys and that's fine I don't I don't know why you modular and don't plays and only got four things all the devalued where I don't know I think and I've never. You did your children well. I'm gonna give myself some men you are pushing at the noise canceling headphones. Mutants some terms and who's. Listen to launch. The feminist sentiments are registered to mention love scene shown. This is the throne and from just an extra forty dollars a week. Did you mention goes forward looking older and fitness. And I laughed but. It's flattered that you. It is who fled. It does have an off day does have a dollar goes I've done all I know I'm better than I did and it does and does a no I bought a lot so I couldn't afford all pay our schedule us thing and yet to tighter credit card Arnold might not nearly seven years ruin but don't walk into a brand does sound but I guess they aren't getting my understanding who are. Ice also those commercials late at night for their computers that you made the weekly payments all right site you know. Bucks a week to come up with thirty bucks sweet this was at a time when when we got paid. Instead of grocery shopping in lieu groceries that is bought cases of passing cartons of cigarettes to last me tragic grocery shopping when I was running Jose. Because I knew I wouldn't have money all those things makes sense not doesn't. Residents whose camera and swing. How would you most bottoming exercise I don't know on the station and really treasures these felons owlen. Here's Rupert should Obama thinks god yeah. Just met and got clocked at another business. You're really pushing for the moon this is gonna today this dialogue. Man don't walk away. I don't see I don't wanna see LeBron you can I don't want to play. I don't know. She knew. Just take my picture and expect a big song and. What are you gonna do you walk away what did you all around us senator. Yeah cinema now let get away with deadly campaign designed. But no I don't add back these payments not all bad. Guys really pissed me off. I as walked. So go to mass promised job paid double and three months. I'm Matt twelve year alone. If this kid out there that makes you do a better I was the late in games on student loan that's for its support to. 34 bits well schooled for a man wondered and no one he's. Thatcher they do it. The cuts. And doubtless not that I'm in May he payments every month since I just want me I'm 34 years. By the way for what school did you go to Harvard's. They I think it's how do you still we are planning effort for AJ fan meal. So Luke. Fourteen years later submit. However a total loan when I told them I'd only afford to pay fifty bucks a month that it is wild affair that kind of thing off. Coming of fifty dollar monthly payment slot that's gotten us. It's give colleges the loan rich off my mil player from 2001. Hot man. I should've played sports how would you go phone call and I remember what it was a pleaser as usual my dad you're a prisoner monies in the college they said will. Co sign on the loans for used that was what he did my dad's an up close sign that you've got to make the payments don't screw up my credit your Brothers and partied a party. Fought this battle for years to your browser whaling you and then hurting my credits and please make the payments. So I had to make sure I made the payments I had to work with him to get the payments on to something I can afford it. So it's been fifty dollars a month I think it's for life. I don't even know I don't even look to see with a total bounces I some it'll never be paid off. There's fifty dollars they just take it out every month. You know what kind of blue notebook computer right now. Yeah. Then when the lights on the outside and she knows things are sweet pretty sweet. And your lows. You yellow blue hippo computers for the lights on the outside no water bottle and a clear case resilience has only 799 am PR machine me. Some sort of rough style dragon thing you know that in. Rare and I'd love to go over your house yeah. I mean I wouldn't. I love to go there and you're not there and and look around to see that kind of stuff you know and it's got awesome stuff. There's just prevention. Yeah anywhere arming climate. With puzzlement Mexican army can't be just. Truly got gold and consequential senate he gently as soon as there were up. I win this money in the morning and and that's right you walk away command city got. OK you know those who weren't designed to those who they'll walk away from. That prisoner officers not easy listening in as Melanie here that you walked out and upload all your view 17 contracts right now. But that is an agreement that you would stay so long that it cut the flow of the game right now and if it is under employed. This Kyle. Making phone calls right now. If you've got an agency in the area we've got one threatening. Jump. Get a different. This is a big fish so. He's into these though I knew it wouldn't be good tease out what it will do so well. Steve left. Off from that payment plans we could Eagles went too much but at 7%. Yes people around forever. Via a teacher. Who went missing. With these student. Down. Yesterday reformer on the air. So if I were saying I cannot believe they have caught the citizen nationwide search for these two tagged commons. And this student of his which he talked about you know before they went missing she posts this up on FaceBook about being a love getting married he searched how true. Live off the grid had a myriad teenager. And his family had been on TV his wife went on ABC and did an interview these kids went on television his daughter. His daughters were interviewed. Right. You know asking him to come home and seeing what they thought about their dad there's. He's reminded us for our entire life. And that's Romans 828. And that god uses all things for the glory of those that love the lord. And I caught according to his purpose sex and that means even next. I have no idea what that means but it sounds like 200 had to come home office maybe Jesus wanted him to run away with a stroke but they found. If I'm them. Found the suvs that they were looking for the 2015 Nissan. And does this sound both of them. Little bit later after search and she is safe there northern California right now. And he's been arrested. Clearly were hiding lights and sound like they're hiding them. Steve Parker sums in northern California. I. Did you see. She's the story about Eli. Meaning no. So he's been accused of so lean. Memorabilia. Are trying to get a hold the fate memorabilia it's a memorabilia stand. So apparently there is an email. And it alleges. They allege. That this email. Was from him ask him equipment manager at the giants' fourth helmets that looked like. Game day helmets and he would warrant. So it sounds like. What they're accusing him of is asking the equipment guy pace emissions up it looks like we use in the game so that I can sell it which I'm thinking why does Eli. Why would he need to do that I think he makes funny money from the giants organization he wouldn't have to sell game day helmets to sports memorabilia people. He made a statement earlier today say he's done nothing wrong. I would like to drive put Angolan news past couple days. However because this is pending litigation. Or not bill into questions are going to specific piece on the back. We'll stay that I've never done it but I've been accused of doing. I have no reason nor ever have any reason to me if you let me just I've done nothing wrong I'm not enough time. I know this is all of doesn't Arivalo suits that would. Again I can't do much but we haven't they about Duncan's team. I like that everyone's Ernesto about the survey things can't you present you guys talk about the upcoming season right. Ball go ahead and answer your questions. The lawsuit claims the email as evidence that the quarterback attempted to falsify the nature of the equipment giving to Steiner sports is part of a memorabilia contract according to the New York Post. Choices shoes is a story is weeks old boys. Which won the missing and a time. They just found in today. Are limited you are men's room. I don't know I did the press conference touch line isn't pandering to groups as a news man. Forty minutes ago two hours ago eight minutes ago. I don't know. I like god I got historian. Perez furnaces you guys really have such low self esteem that putting people down on a daily basis and zero I feel better about your own lives is as us and across as he answers yes absolutely I was trying to explain this to somebody the other guys. There's this weird thing and you're built like me right. Mean air America. You don't like me and by the way this is a very very very low level we are the the bottom level of these types of people. But it goes all the way I guarantee to Robin Williams right. Greg Geraldo right. Dave Chappelle people who do what we do. Which is trying. To perform in some sort of fashion. To make you laugh or smile or make your life feel better right. We are the kind of people who are self loathing. And we never believe. That anyone actually likes us right are so low. If if me and some fans are out and people say now man I love you guys. Most people would be like that man that's awesome man who was at a lawless right. But the way that were built rethink. Okay. And that's great Ryan. But I don't know that I I does site. Mute but if you knew me you wouldn't like me I've always said if someone is usually how it might have been among complements me I think they don't know me very well as someone criticizes me I think they see right through me they know me and then if you find someone and I guarantee you like just assuming that I am. But if you find someone that you really really like you say you love them right. Then. You almost need some sort of constant reassurance which is just. God is. Way too much or any other person to have to live with the ordeal when Bryant because you never actually believe that they like you back. And so therefore. Use then at which we have talked about fall in love very easily right and then self destructed destroyed. That's because you don't believe that Israel. And then eventually you just tell yourself. Because you're never happy. Most people when they find some of my leg to become happy but you know become happier right. You become like oh man this is. I can only think about when when when this is gonna end I think it's our loans are gonna feel it right now. She does limit a constant state of unhappiness million makes me happy is men posted on. So give me facts can you give me back a month. I am for it hit. Jesus isn't he goes on the drinks about it writing. Why it. Eagles on donors like to chant of bench until enough builds the same clock. Doesn't care. So he wins. If he wins it goes almost official has played guitar and I got seven girls on a phone touch at all times. Shame challenge and play your game as sure of Britain and the girl thing is true but I do think he goes summoned and drinks away via anger. Turbines on about as much bad non alcoholic he's about last minutes and that's about it. Definitely a for. To Minnesota so love for us is like our own personal rent to own suicide pitch yeah. Like that's exactly. Does presence is from Robin Williams and Dave Chappelle you're not sir. Of course we're not sand saying it like I'm very local level. I'm very small level on one level the underneath the weatherman a little revision of that right so we read it right. Why. You read about how these guys are depressed when you think why would they be depressed right there hack being. They tell jokes they make people laugh. People like them. Yet they can't get it straight right they can get it straightened I had because they're depressed because we've been depressed since the beginning of time. Our time so we've always been trying to join us. Dog and pony show to make you liked us writing in to keep people who distance runner. Jackson. So no I in no way MIA. Comparing my talents. To Robin Williams and comparing my depression. To Robin. Does that make sense. Yes right. Palin will headline. Okay you ever watch a Fox 4 News. Well a lot of people do. Okay and they did a story. Yesterday. Tomorrow night's. You know local mites are back running all kind. That time a year last year reading I was getting eaten up by Hamels a lot of his words back and write this things they just came to town. Few years ago we never had a deal to another everywhere in the course of course each year. Guess a story experts say we casino earlier than normal this year because of the watt mild winter that we've had this shortly itself how bad they're going to be again this year. What's interesting about it is it. All this because and that's. Yeah. It's oh yeah and center. A doctor from. It might. Spread to talk about how he's come on other shows up the center of the annoyance I am and you're famous. That's just how lots I didn't know man I'm sorry my brother I'm sure expert who's the expert to. My family. On the noose. Jam isn't even live here. Even quoted a master. They interviewed him. Pretty sweet now that your brother man yeah you got any questions about a large sites you know and who'd ask. To attack I ask you and you ask him and then ask him nuts good. He's out it's also look pretty knowledgeable about the chiefs very opinionated so. Best in me the most by any either want I think if you could really oh my it's affected chiefs I don't know when I. July as a loss nausea owed mice will affect the chiefs of the really open minds gives achieves a home field advantage. Or not. You never know whether to use a Specter defects. The. No it's like she's happens he'd. It's gonna happen. Now you know he could be teaching. Sometimes it takes some second. Rethink of that. Match just sitting there. You're watching TV normal this year because of the Wada model run should have had but it's usually a brother Paul mentally and energy and his there's no way you can just. You know once you finally enforcing this and your brother showed us where possible which occurred in the Kansas City area so Kansas is the epicenter. People each might and I think as it spreads outward we're gonna continue to be. This center of the annoyance factor for this particular species yes. The center on the annoyance factor what does that even mean. You should sound professional and didn't make any sense zone. It was just rambled worst. He said that Kansas is going to be dissension like episodes. Unsure of the annoyance factor in this particular species break that down to the annoyance factor is probably all over the midwest where the center of it. For this particular policy they started a big gun dealers aren't here yeah. Donna why they started out someone brought him. Don't. We don't know somehow they've restaurant and I think it's a different Europe good. You know clippers I don't drown your bass hole I said Lawrence Kansas City yet not a lot of international travelers here but just for you. You know ex wife going to Europe three times a month or whatever it was. Would you go like six times. All in. That's why your Brothers expert doctor win at all sort of become a family a minus. Will affect the chiefs' season he said probably. And is in hot probably. So don't you're asking financial advice he's pretty good with the money to hold on. Kid and he's got a good credits rolled candy and money by. Delegate Ph.D. M that morning. She hit. Right doesn't mean these are good with his money management batch of news. Maybe he's happy doing what he does. Everything. Maybe doesn't come in everyday slipped to number of those things are talking about is not how are they without suicide beating his strategy shows kids. Every day. You learn a model mites. That's my brother. I'm not gonna let this conversation with of them. This thing. Very Smart man like him. Telling you timing more than women injured two semesters at whatever school and you're still paying an option on human Monica. Yeah you pay for any school all scholarships all the way. Never spent and done. And then you just adamant do you show about Thanksgiving down to our own money around and look at me. Yes and when we get mom a bigger TV. And I civil someone should ask me exactly right that's unsolicited and advertise here are bought her a bigger TV in the one that you guys all went together. The bias of so much of call me first. On you guys. I'll Paulette education take over the best minds on a bison to winning. Here's an idea. Finances. They called an education over there and get a bunch of stuff that you really want and finance. Or ten years. Going to be over here Rowland joins a fifty dollar bills. They don't know what to do it this morning and I know. But it probably find something to do with that but. His lack the motivation. Yeah. Mostly sleep I hardly work so as the most my time in bed. That memory foam mattresses paperwork. They gave it to. I just sex I love you guys but today your show has been boring as fast that at a look at how man that's no gone by god to an absolute excellent. It still comes in there he is in my other T-Mobile phone to send anonymous tax. I mean this could be mean to some but this is an orange should do and. It's extremely. An adjustment to attract. Don't ask don't. Ask you know Ali okay second to second guess. And to come up bad. And just Latin. We're gonna walk out of here and just leave this music playing. Yeah music bed and nothing else. You wanted to see boring yeah hundred Lauren rich. But smoke some weed. Did you catch. Them. Canada and on the national. It was an all day ones. I. I. I. They left they won't believe strongly that left. And yeah it is happening now basically go to the look and leave this. And I can.