Afentra's Big Fat Morning Buzz




Monday, April 22, 2013

Buzz Briefs



The Boston mess is over for now... we can kind of recap what happened after we left on Friday.




Buzz Briefs 2



The FCC is laying off a little bit for someone from Boston... and maybe not so much for a guy from North Dakota.


 
 




Hash tag game for Amanda Palmer

Poem by Amanda Palmer:

you don’t know how it felt to be in the womb but it must have been at least a little warmer than this.

you don’t know how intimately they’re recording your every move on closed-circuit cameras until you see your face reflected back at you through through the pulp.

you don’t know how to stop picking at your fingers.

you don’t know how little you’ve been paying attention until you look down at your legs again.

you don’t know how many times you can say you’re coming until they just stop believing you.

you don’t know how orgasmic the act of taking in a lungful of oxygen is until they hold your head under the water.

you don’t know how many vietnamese soft rolls to order.

you don’t know how convinced your parents were that having children would be, absolutely, without question, the correct thing to do.

you don’t know how precious your iphone battery time was until you’re hiding in the bottom of the boat.

you don’t know how to get away from your fucking parents.

you don’t know how it’s possible to feel total compassion in one moment and total disconnection in the next moment.

you don’t know how things could change so incredibly fast.

you don’t know how to make something, but the instructions are on the internet.

you don’t know how to make sense of this massive parade.

you don’t know how to believe anyone anymore.

you don’t know how to tell the girl in the chair next to you that you’ve been peeking at her dissertation draft and there’s a grammatical typo in the actual file name.

you don’t know how to explain yourself.

you don’t want two percent but it’s all they have.

you don’t know how claustrophobic your house is until you can’t leave it.

you don’t know why you let that guy go without shooting him dead and stuffing him in some bushes between cambridge and watertown.

you don’t know where your friends went.

you don’t know how to dance but you give it a shot anyway.

you don’t know how your life managed to move twenty six miles forward and twenty eight miles back.

you don’t know how to pay your debts.

you don’t know how to separate from this partnership to escape and finally breathe.

you don’t know how come people run their goddamn knees into the ground anyway.

you don’t know how to measure the value of the twenty dollar bill clutched in your hurting hand.

you don’t know how you walked into this trap so obliviously.

you don’t know how to adjust the rearview mirror.

you don’t know how to mourn your dead brother.

you don’t know how to drive this car.

you don’t know the way to new york.

you don’t know the way to new york.

you don’t know the way to new york.

you don’t know the way to new york.

#YouDontKnow
 


 


 





Here is our response:



A Poem for Amanda Palmer (you don’t know)
Written by: Afentra’s Big Fat Morning Buzz (on the Alternative 96.5 the Buzz, Kansas City) Genius and Attractive Listners
you don’t know how it feels to have to choose paper or plastic
you don’t know if Ann Frank was a Belieber
you don’t know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop
you don’t know what it’s like behind blue eyes
you don’t know who’s your baby daddy
you don’t know you are NOT the father
you don’t know how many cats it takes to make Vietnamese soft rolls
you don’t know why Amanda Palmer calls them “soft rolls” instead of “spring roll”
you don’t know what I did last summer, so stop pretending
you don’t know what it’s like to only have 12 followers
you don’t know the pain of choosing salad, then wanting soup instead as the waiter walks away
you don’t know why people like Mumford and Sons
you don’t know why your check engine light keeps coming on
you don’t know me. A song by Ben Folds featuring Regina Spektor
you don’t know how many pints are in a gallon
you don’t know most of the words to that Alt_J song either
you don’t know what it’s like to haiku
you don’t know if you will ever get google fiber
you don’t know how hard it is to smoke yourself to the point of having to turn up the volume on the TV to taste your food
you don’t know if it is just a cold sore
you don’t know whether a tomato is a fruit or a vegetable
you don’t know if that’s really your air filter at Jiffy Lube
you don’t know  the hypotenuse is equal to the sum of the areas of the squares whose sides are the two legs
you don’t know Keyzer Söze
you don’t know what Eddie Vetter is saying either
you don’t know the muffin man
you don’t know what the Rock is cookin’
you don’t know what to do with wide ruled notebook paper
you don’t know how many McChickens to order at 3am
you don’t know what its like to be the 16th best radio station in Kansas City
you don’t know how many people think they were the first to think of the Tootsie Pop tweet
you don’t what you’re talking about Wilis
you don’t what you’re talking about Wilis
you don’t what you’re talking about Wilis
you don’t what you’re talking about Wilis
 
Written by (in order of appearance)
@bzieglerkc
@envcrazzyhp
@akgarcia331
@angrysubby
@christywasted
ABFMB
Texline #5233
Texline #4479
@unxiled
@singnpeach13
@kristencesar
@notlazlothebuzz
Texline #8938
@NicoleHH11
Texline (unknown)
@djphoto76
Texline #4282
@soul_justice
Textline #1760
@hugh2d2
Textline #7133
@mrs_barnhart
@dannyboi965
@itswern
@creepyowllady
@KerriluvsKU
@Vyze13
Textline #4273
@BishopAnonymous
@dangerSuave
@rckchkhwk
@trueMelode



Tags :  
Topics : Entertainment_CultureSports
Social :
Locations : BostonNorth Dakota




 
04/22/2013 10:52AM
Monday, April 22, 2013
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